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Baby there are so many words

I'd love to say, words that you'd

never hear without first hearing

my silence.

There are things I'd love to show you;

things you could already paint down

on canvas but never through

my eyes.

There was one night when you were

floating off to bliss and I was trapped

in the irony that you'd painted my toes

blood red.

It never got lost on me that

I gave you the key to the city

for burning down

city hall.

I know you have more flight than

a gander of geese and I have

more foundation than the

capitol city

and mostly I know that I'm just

the small town you couldn't wait

to leave, regardless of the lights calling

you home.

Mature Content Filter is On
(Contains: strong language)
Every time you feed me the question that
I'm hungry for, I find my mouth full, chewing.

How do I tell you what's on my mind
when I've already watched this crash course
ending a hundred times and I still turn the ignition?

Baby, I'm not huffing and puffing
that's just me shoving air between my
heart and my nerves; that's just my
lungs damning my heart for this beating.

And I'm not saying anyone has fault,
because it's hard to fault emotions,
it's hard to fault drunken second guesses
when fingertips do all the thinking and
lips are too busy with kissing, for talking.

I say we are the same and you say,
"No, that you let people in and don't let them
know, but I let them know, but not it,'
but baby, nobody knows anything.

We only feel

And when I feel that wall at the
ending for the 101st time I wonder
what it is that you feel, because sometimes
not trusting feels so much like trusting,
because sometimes regret feels like desire
and sometimes closing down feels like

opening up.

A wise woman once said to me,
"It just sounds like you're just
afraid to commit, not to her, or a woman,
man, you're afraid of life."

I wonder if people consider Earth a woman because she's so good
at being built on, walked on, taken advantage of

And I wonder if people consider Time a man because he's so good
at healing, at taking, at never giving a seconds thought.

I know that sometimes it rains when your rivers are already full
Rushing your riverbeds away, water never means to undermine you.
Water is just looking for a place to go, a current to follow, a cave to fill;

But wouldn't you rather be over-saturated than dry and cracked dehydrated?
Wouldn't you rather be the sustenance instead of being pawed, exfoliated
by a desperate wildebeest? But we are not nature depicted,

And then again, we are.

I don't apologize for the way a hummingbird finds his nectar,
long bill fishing between the petals, thirsty, because
we did that. We threw the line into the pond and the
fish were plenty and I do not apologize.

Mature Content Filter is On
(Contains: sexual themes)
I was just getting started, just dipping my fingers
when I caught your scent, like a honeybee
finding a blossom full of nectar.

My fingertips providing the chills of finding
the strap that held you in, forefinger and
thumb pressing your clasp,

I could smell your age.

I could tell that you'd had one too many
birthdays, one too many arguments,
one too many days when your child
didn't call.

I had no idea what I was getting into,
no idea that I'd be obsessed with the
pages spilling out of your bellybutton.

And I needed it, like people need
religion, even if I know that
sometimes needing isn't believing.

When you climbed into the car
that October day, I wonder
if you thought that Death was
giving you a ride.

And as my nude fingers grasp the
last page of our amour, did you know,
lost in the passenger seat, that it was
one you weren't coming back from?

The first time I saw your shoulder,
peeking like a Muslim under her hijab,
I looked away, like I had never seen
a shoulder before, like I had never
wondered what secrets my lips would
find in the pockets of your collarbone.

The first time I saw your bellybutton,
I knew it'd be the most of you I'd ever see.
I knew you'd be chalked up as a loss,
like everyone's first kiss, like every
adult's young aspirations.

And though I never saw the parts of you,
hidden precariously under single layers,
I still saw you, more guarded than your
body's secrets, dipping your toes,
chipped green polish, into the trust
of another man.

Overwhelmed, I say, "I love you"
because I have too much of an
affair with my phone to articulate
what I'm really feeling.

And after I see your hand, for the
first time in years, grasping for
what we once were, I say it again,
"I love you," realizing that love
is a verb we're all misusing.

So, saw an "ex" fucking in a parking lot. Didn't know whether to be sad, angry, or disappointed. Turns out I was all three. Suhweet.


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Artist | Student | Literature
United States
Current Residence: Cullman, Alabama, USA
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Scarlettletters Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2012  Professional Writer
Valsoney Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012
Thanks so much for the support :)
HaloAddict16 Featured By Owner May 4, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks for the watch, I'll try and get some more work up soon :) For now, I will return the favor.
MaybeNotVad Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2011
Thanks a lot for the FAVE!!!!!! :)
weirneich92 Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
hi there :D

thank you very much for the fave :hug:

have a nice day :D
dasuebel Featured By Owner Jan 2, 2011  Hobbyist Photographer
Hey, thank you so much for the fave on [link] !
mcmanusedward Featured By Owner Dec 30, 2010  Student Traditional Artist
Thanks for the Fave!! :D
happy583 Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2010  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thanks for the fave!!!! :hug:
WilliamsMind Featured By Owner Dec 24, 2010  Hobbyist Photographer
Thanks for the favs my man!
Chaotic-Whispers Featured By Owner Jul 16, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
Hi there.

Thanks so much for the watch.

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